Life is complex
You should know that upfront.
There will be tears and hurt and joy and pain
So much love and magic and heartbreak.
Did I mention Life is kinda weird
It is the cacophony of people and things
Ideas and promises we meant to keep
Think of it like a symphony
We each are members of this perfect sound
But independent the song just ain’t the same
Like Drake without the corny dancing
Ok that’s a terrible example
But you know what I mean
We are a symphony
Having a part to play and should we give it our all
We get to bask in the goosebumps
Get to settle into the magic
And speaking of magic
This is the best part
But it is tricky tho
Because magic is this illusion right
This crazy blend of intoxicating allure and hard work
Sometimes you will feel like a prop
Feel like an unfinished trick
But should we execute masterfully
You get to understand the bigger picture
You get the stand center stage while the world claps
And that feels fantastic even if the whole world isn’t actually clapping, let me tell you
Picture yourself in the face of your next heartbreak
But equipped with the knowledge that it all works out
Would you still feel as devastated?
Looking back, I wish I would have known how good my life was going to get
How each hurt prepared me for the next best version of myself
I might have seen rejection as God’s protection and let that fool go with greater ease
Your perspective is your saving grace
Press your spirit against your faith
And promise yourself that something more is coming
This is how you heal.
Do not sulk
Do not give up
Do not invest your energy in people who do not value you
Your duty is to place yourself in the best case scenario but not on some creepy capitalist crabs in a barrel tip
But by proving that you are worthy of magnificence
ESPECIALLY when your faith is wavering
And I mean faith like
Only visualizing positive outcomes
Like praying to your god prayers of thanks even when nothing is working because you Know something will
Faith like not losing hope for recovery
Like staying the course
And when we all do this work
This hard to describe work of not letting our past define the outcome of our future
And if we heal individually, so do we collectively
And on the other side of pain, we find love
We find joy in the laughter of children
We find balance because we did the work
And it ain’t easy my friend
Healing is not easy
But it can be the best thing you ever do
For yourself and humanity.
Watch the video HERE
There is an urge
A desire of sorts
Release every old heart break
Every thing my daddy never said
All that my mother too quickly speaks
I want to let go
Float on top the water
Be mermaid and fairytale
Be six and careless
In the rain, I want to run
Want to lay in lavender
Press my skin in the ocean
Wrote this poem for California’s Prop47.
I thought we would stay
In this little land of escape
Make it normal to be here
Call it home someday
That is why I dare myself to hate you
You left me
Tell me you love me
From the other end of fingers pressed on phone
I do not feel your love
Only see it on a screen
So I delete you a little more each day
Remember you less
Love you less
I wrote this for you. For this moment. For all that tomorrow will bring.
It is nights like these I am so happy I could scream
My life is so magnificent
Need. To. catch. my. breath.
There are tears just on the border of every smile
No one ever told me HOW dreams come true
Just that they do
And so, as I overlook a city built on sin
Every inch of my being is in gratitude
For I did not know this day would come so soon
That my smile would be so young
That I would still be able to call home to share the news
I did not know success would be this humbling
Did not know for sure that if I just kept writing these poems
Of love and truth
They would find everyone they were meant to
I wasn’t sure the world would hear me
But you do
And I am left in awe
Of how of every damn day before this one is responsible for the ground I stand on now
So thank you for trusting your gut
For seeing this fire in me
For trusting and giving me the space to be completely and authentically me.
There is no place I’d rather be.
The hurt is some where
Between my bones and skin
Separate from my blood
I hope you all are well. I just wanted to share with you some new things.
1. I was asked to do a tribute to Dr. Maya Angelou, the day she died. The video is out. Please watch it.
2. Have you heard of Google Helpouts? It’s basically like YouTube tutorials but live and with the person! I just love the idea of connecting and talking about how to be inspired and get to our goals…so I created a helpout for all my poetry lovers. Your first session is free so you should def schedule a session! Link: Write Now?
3. Last night I wrote a poem. Then a few minutes later I decided to record a video for my YouTube channel that I have been neglecting. So the poem “just for tonight” is up now. Watch, comment, share!
I adore you guys.
Today is May 28, 2014. I am in a hotel room in San Francisco. I had a meeting today with Sephora to talk about working together. I woke up in Los Angeles. When I stepped out of the shower my friend said “Maya Angelou died.” She was in her late 80’s and lived (what I consider) a full life. As I waiting in the airport to board my fight I got a phone call from SoulPancake asking if I could shoot a poem about Dr. Angelou. We talked details about gathering a team in San Fran to shoot it and I got on the plane. Excited and frantic, I focused to write. The poem did not come easy. I struggled with what to say first, I had questions I didn’t know if they fit into the poem. I had too many feeling to know exactly where to start. But I did, flushed the ideas out and finished with several minutes in my 70 minute flight left to spare. I landed with no team to shoot the poem but a few minutes later a team had been formed. I headed to my hotel to freshen up before meeting with Sephora. I walked the 4 blocks and found myself in this lovely office. The meeting was from 1:30-5. My shoot was scheduled for 3:30. After some lunch and a brainstorming session, I headed to meet the team. We shot the poem in about 25 minutes and I went back to my meeting. The VP of Education at Sephora University brought me a Oprah Chai Tea which was the first time I had ever had one.
The day has been so emotionally driven. Filled with so much excitement. I am a black woman poet on the day Dr. Angelou died. I am so honored to do what I love, to be a poet people call when things happen and important people die. To be able to write these poems. Dr Angelou paved the way for me to be living this wonderful life right now… I’m so grateful to her.
I know she is in perfect love and peace as I write this. I’m grateful for that too.
When a person is abused
Even strangers will know
Will be able to catch a faint whiff of far too passive
Will hear the “help me” long after it has dissolved in the throat
Even the walls will speak cryptic
Will hang frames sideways and off center
Nothing is right where busted lips keep quiet
Where screams are muffled
And tears attempt to fall in the form of letters
in the hope that someone will find them and save her
My god, I have never needed to steady a persons breath for fear of their death if I did nothing
After he pushed his healing wife
Bruised her arm and left marks
His mother said “I don’t get in the middle of other people’s relationships”
If ever there was something to get in the middle of, I swear to god it is this
I didn’t sleep much that night
Kept trying to listen
Was waiting for her scream
Shrill and urgent
At day break the house was so quiet
Even thoughts seemed loud
I wondered which of them killed everyone else
I’ve never woken up to a nightmare but I imagine these are the signs that Freddy has the address
It should be no surprise when he arrives but everyone will be
Too many will be shocked but none were there.
In the middle.
Just before the guns arrived.